Why do we no longer expect the same from love at 30?

Pull your hair out what someone once said PlatoPursuing a romantic relationship, after a certain age, often means accepting a myriad of rakes, inflicting a whirlwind of failed, overly sloppy kisses, and endless scrolls on dating apps in the middle of the night. It’s exhausting, expensive and time-consuming. Of course, when everything goes well, it can be truly fantastic (a source of pleasure, even a way to find love), but when it goes wrong, it can quickly become oppressive and, in the end, feeling like you’ve got it. job interview after another to become “the one who ticks all the boxes.”

30 years old and looking for love

I spent the first half of my thirties in a relationship. Single for almost a year, a friend asked me a question as fateful as it was falsely naive: “But deep down, what are you looking for?” “Well,” I answered calmly, “I’m looking for a guy willing to commit, handsome, kind, ambitious, athletic, creative, fun, if possible taller than me, handy, who goes to the psychiatrist and who is willing. to start a family but do not yet have children, ideally between 36 and 43 years old, give or take a year.” Nothing very complicated in short.

“You’re looking for the rare gem, the yeti,” he replied.

“No, it’s just called trying to find love at 37.”

A search for love between idealism and reality: what does that bring?

It goes without saying that at any age, dating has its risks. But for those of us who are presumed to have fully entered adulthood, I still wonder if things don’t get more complicated after age 30.

I would like to point out that I have always liked flirting and meeting people. I love sitting in a bar with a drink in my hand and meeting new people. I like the tension of knowing how physical contact will happen, if it will happen. Are we going to kiss? Will it surreptitiously brush against my thigh? Would you meet me at your apartment? What will be in your refrigerator? Apart from beers and expired things (the dream)? But after thirty things get complicated. The shooting window seems to be closing, your eggs are reaching their deadline and every day you are a little closer to death. There are so many clichés that ring irritatingly true.

Leave a Comment